methamphetamine

I had just left the all time, well at least one of the bottom 10, all time worst AA meetings I have ever been in. I’m not judging. I’m just saying. I left grateful that I’m me, and I’m at this place in recovery. Enough said. So the 10:00 meeting I was [...]

Dennis is a “30 day wonder” and an unfortunate artifact of my bad old days; and he was at the meeting I went to last night.  I don’t normally attend the local gay AA meeting except on milestones.  I’ve heard that all you need to start a new meeting is a resentment and a coffee [...]

First of all, what the fuck happened to my wigits? They’re just gone. Erased. Blank. Vanished. I have to reconstruct every last custom setting that was in them which is a giant pain in the butt. Tatum O’Neil is on crack? Are you kidding me? Tatum O’Neil allegedly smokes [...]

I am a head injury patient. I am. There is hardly another explanation. I sat in a meeting and shared about it and of course I was told to work the steps. Of course there is some truth in that, truth I sometimes ignore out of an objective bias against people [...]

I’ll be gone for awhile. I’m checking in to a rehab and I expect I’ll be gone for at least a month. I just need to do something about this problem before someone does something about it for me. I’m not happy. I’m not content. I don’t want to go on living like this. And while [...]

If you had asked me yesterday at this time how I was doing I would have told you that, for the moment anyway, I had been relieved of that odd hook that has always followed me with this addiction; the regret that I had not gotten high one more time. It left me temporarily. It’s [...]

I’m not sure if I know what I was getting myself in to moving into the Compas House. It’s a theraputic community run by S.H.I.P., Inc. which is a not-for-profit here in Boise that helps people in recovery stay sober and have access to affordable housing. The “TC” includes housing which I share [...]

On one of the blogs I love I noticed this morning that I’m apparantly not the only one going through this. I guess things are shitty all over. Oddly, that makes me feel good. I don’t sleep through the night anymore. I have a hard time concentrating. It may take me [...]

This is day 5. I can’t tell you about the first 4 days. I wasn’t here for them. Not much anyway. I spent the better part of them sleeping. And eating. I think I’ve gained ten pounds since I last used. I want to get high so [...]