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A.
Atheist.
Two and a half years sober and I find myself so fucked off about the conception of god that I got sober with that I can’t live joyfully. In all likelihood I just haven’t given myself enough time to heal or something but at the moment it seems like the “power” that got me [...]
My favorite writer, Paul Monette, along with several collections of poetry, an acclaimed collection of essays, and two biographies, one of which won the National Book Award, wrote a bunch of pulp fiction. It is pulp. The stories aren’t challenging. They don’t really give one much to think about. But they are so beautifully written [...]
That was a more emotional weekend than I expected. I learned all kinds of things about my grandmother that I never knew; saw pictures of her I had never seen. It was clear from looking at them that she was as happy or happier in the last ten years of her life than [...]
I spent yesterday in service to AA. I began the day at 7 AM with my friends Owen and Robert driving to Oregon to attend my first Area Assembly, the semi-annual meeting where the General Service Representatives (me) from around southern Idaho (the area) gather to conduct the business of Alcoholics Anonymous. It [...]
Ive been knocked out of the race
But Ill get better”
Sting, Lithium Sunset
I’m trying to give myself a break, because I had bronchitis and all. But objectively, I feel like what’s going on is clinical depression. When I got to treatment I was full on manic. That slowed down. I bounced [...]
But to my credit I did go to the clinic yesterday and get some antibiotics. I don’t know the medical term but my sinuses and lungs have been carefully coated with rubber cement. I wish I could say that I’m adjusting well but I’m kind of struggling. I’ve been faking it well. [...]
so many things seem filled with the intent to be lost
that their loss is no disaster.
from One Art by Elizabeth Bishop
Yesterday I stopped by an [sic] old friend’s house to pick up the worldly goods and the junk about which I become sentimental; stuff I left in his care a couple of months ago when [...]
The Last Chance Texaco salutes . . .
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