It should have become clear to me a long time ago. Perhaps it was and I simply hadn’t the willingness to do something about it, but it is clear now that I can benefit from therapy. I don’t think I’ll make any significant gains in becoming happy without professional help. So in addition to starting medication, I’ve started counseling.
I had my first session today. Anita gave me homework. She says that I’m self-contradictory and she wants me to become mindful of that and let her know in our next session what I’ve observed. She also suggested that I’m a perfectionist, an idea that I immediately bristled against. If I was a perfectionist would I have 2 empty cat food cans in the left kitchen sink?
“How would you feel if somebody moved them to the right side?” she asked.
Well, that would make me crazy. If they are going to bother to move them, why not just move them to the garbage?
“Exactly,” she replied. “Perfectionistic and self-contradictory.”
I’m not sure that I really understand what she is driving at. I’m not even sure that I’ll be able to recognize when I am being self-contradictory.
We’ll give it a shot, though.
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Hey… that’s a trick question whose answer could qualify any diagnosis . No matter, therapy can be a lot of fun too. Once you establish a rapport with your therapist you can use that space to explore, at least intellectually, anything. I have always found therapy to be, if nothing else, extremely interesting. Often it was helpful but always it was interesting. But you must put your foot down. No more trick questions!
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My therapist said something like that to me. I’m a horrible housekeeper, the place is a mess, so what she said didn’t make sense. Then she explained that if I can’t do something perfectly, I’m likely to not do it at all. That kind of makes sense. Don’t know if it applies to your situation, but this post brought it to mind.
Good luck with the therapy. It can be very helpful. I hope it is in your case.
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I can remember the first “real therapy” I received – she told me that I was angry and needed to be more assertive – I laughed in her face. I NEVER went back – and about six years later after the most hellish period of my life I found out she was exactly right.
Another perspective on my life and thoughts is so important to me – someone totally removed from the emotion and can hear the broken thinking that I’m doing. All I need them to do is identify it – kind of pull at the end of the knotted up string my thoughts have gotten into – it changes everything for me.
The unexamined life truly is not worth living. Proud of you brother!
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Thanks for the post.
That was a great response from the therapist. LOL
It was a good example
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