The end of the second road.

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By the time a person has been sober six years, they have gotten pretty good at navigating the day-to-day demands of a life in recovery.  In six years time they have also likely been through a major life event, or two, or three; a marriage or divorce, a death, a job change, a move, the loss of a friendship and the establishment of new ones.  In fact, at six years, finding new experiences that relate directly to the acquisition of the skills necessary to stay sober, becomes rare.  The skills are in place.  Recovery is secure.  All that is left is to remain diligent and willing to use those skills.

My writing here is an honest reflection of what it was like for me to recover from a profound addiction to crystal meth.  I won’t minimize the process.  It was difficult.  It was painful.

It is also the most worthwhile thing I ever did.  If you are new to recovery or if you are looking for experience and hope that recovery from crystal meth addiction is possible, I encourage you to read this blog from the beginning.  I have no doubt that you will recognize something of yourself and of your own experience on these pages.

My life is very different now.  I have what the book Alcoholics Anonymous refers to as “the promises.”  I know new freedom and happiness.  I don’t regret the past and I don’t feel the need to hide from it.  I know what it is like to have my life work, without the intentional creation of chaos.  My attitude about life and the way I see the world are very different from they were before my recovery.  The things that hold my attention and that I wish to devote myself to are different, and it would be disingenuous for me to continue to try to force myself to write on something when I have had nothing new to contribute in such a long time.  But I do want to take the opportunity to thank those of you who read and commented and encouraged me along the way.  Writing made my recovery possible and your support gave me the strength to do it.

May God bless you and keep you.

  1. I’m happy you had the insight to change direction but I will miss reading this blog. I’ve turned a few people on to it, in fact, I use it with my clients. God’s blessings on you dearest Chris. You’ve been a big part of my recovery. I truly hope that continues.

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  2. so grateful to have walked even a small part of this path with you friend!

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  3. My appreciation for your writing and the fact you have moved beyond the person you once were into the individual that you have become this many years out, as I struggle with those thoughts and actions that keep me locked inside that world you seem to barely see in your rearview mirror these days, gives me hope in a future maybe someday too,that I can move beyond this chaos and circular bullshit I create and allow to determine each day at this momment in my life. Thank you, Ciao, Scott.

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    1. oh, scott. you know i tried to keep doing this for another 2 years because of you. I wish I still had something new in me, but . . . Just hold on. No matter what. And before you know it the chaos will seem like it happened to someone else.

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  4. You sound really good. I haven’t checked in here in a long time, and the last time I did you were still in the messy part of the process of getting better, though less messy than previously. (Don’t know if that sentence makes any sense.) It’s really good to see that you’ve posted here fairly recently. Congratulations. Of course “getting better” is always a process, as you well know. I wish you continued success. ((hugs))

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    1. Thank you, Java. To you also.

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  5. This is a great blog, and I will miss reading it. But I guess like all honest and genuine things in this life, there must come a time to end.
    It is amazing that will all the shared pain and common experiences in our lives and our crazy heads, we only grew to know the person after these defining experiences. Maybe that is the beauty of it. These problems aren’t what define us, even though they seem to in our heads.
    Anyway, this is a great contribution Chris, and I am grateful to you for it. I can’t wait to see what you do next. I am proud and grateful that I will get to see. I feel lucky to know you and have you as a part of my life. Thank you.

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