Gerhardt: There’s a time when you can share and you hold hands and be on the same path. But there’s always a fork in the road… at some point. And sometimes you have to go on one part of the fork and they gotta go on the other part of the fork. Or just down the back part of the fork while you go forward. And they’re like *sigh* Or they got a salad fork and you have one of the big dinner forks and you have longer to go but they’re like done because that’s it, they’re stuck on a piece of food, that they *sigh*. A desert fork or like one of those, you know small little shrimp forks or crab forks and you’re trying to get out a crab. They’re like that and you’re over here jumping to the huge serving fork or something like that, or a ladle, you know.
28 Days
The azalea I purchased when I moved in to my new apartment is still alive and blooming. I’m disappointed that the kitten that was supposed to be on it’s way was adopted out from under me. Perhaps it’s a good thing. Perhaps it’s HP’s way of telling me to reconsider the man attracting value of a terrier. I’ve never owned a dog so that would be a new experience. I really am a cat person but cats aren’t boy-magnets. That probably isn’t a good reason to get a dog. But I think thee may actually be value in using a plant and a pet to learn to be available to care for something that is completely dependent on me for survival.
I love Gerhardt. I do a pretty mean impersonation of him which was especially useful when I was in treatment. I think we had a better ropes course. I must have been much younger when I first saw 28 Days because I don’t remember Gerhardt being quite so young and cute or quite as able to look good in a tee. I liked him then. Now I’d totally nail him.
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May 7, 2008 at 7:50 am
warrior scout
sounds like you are looking for companionship.
i am reading a book by david richo titled “how to be an adult in relationships’ which i got as a gift from my sponsor.
it’s amazing to read but more difficult to incorporate into my life.
but i do want my future relationships ( business, friends, social, and love) to be more grounded than i had before.
May 7, 2008 at 9:38 am
Chris
Well, not ‘looking for’ per se, but you’re you’re on the right track. If I approach this the same way I approach my addiction, the relationship is HP’s job. It will appear when it is time - when I’m ready and when it will be most useful. To quote the book, all I can do is “clear the ground a bit”. (I’m not talking about shaving, here but I suppose that applies, too.)
From very early in the program our founders were aware that some of us never got intimate relationships back. Those who stayed sober were called “prodigies of service”. I am aware that I may be a prodigy and not a companion. I’d like to say “I’m completely OK with that” but we know what happens when I say that. I guess I’m just, slowly, clearing ground.
May 7, 2008 at 11:45 am
Java
In my opinion (and it is worth what you’re paying for it) at this time it is probably best to start with one thing at a time. Give the plant the attention it needs, don’t worry about the pet yet.
I want to get a bird. I have a small cage for one. I am waiting until my life feels less stressful and I feel I am truly ready to take on the responsibility of a bird. The perspective: I’ve had this damned cage hanging around waiting for 4 or 5 years. It has seen a lot of changes in its existance here, none of them providing enough stability for it to house the bird.
May 7, 2008 at 1:46 pm
Chris
I think I’d be short changing myself if I stuck with the plant right now. I’m GREAT with plants. Fantastic with plants. But I appreciate your input and I will sit with it a couple of days before deciding that you’re wrong. I mean before deciding to adopt your suggestion. LOLOL
ON THE CAGE THING!!!! Gimme your cage!!! I need it to keep David Archuletta in!!!!! MWAH!
May 7, 2008 at 9:34 pm
Wayward Son
Dogs are genius. I highly recommend them. They are a lot of work and a great deal of responsibility but I have no doubt you would find a way to be the best caretaker of that friendship you could possibly be. And your dog will return the favor in spades. Who could ask for more?
Of course your looking for companionship. We ALL are. And there is all kind of companionship to to be had and nobody is limited to just one kind. It’s all love my friend. All of it.
May 8, 2008 at 1:23 am
Steve Rebooted
Dogs are much better companions, for a single guy! But they are higher maintenance, just like a boyfriend
May 8, 2008 at 1:24 am
Chris
LOL LMAO - Yeah! I get that. I also get it that it’s been more than a year since I got LAID and now I’m living by a different set of guiding principles I can’t just walk in to a bar or jump on PNPcumbucketz.com and “hook up”. Actually I was never very good at it anyway.
I know I might be aiming a bit high. I was homeless and crazy just 17 months ago. You just got me thinking about something though . . . .
Look for the words “let my guard down” in some post in the near future.
May 8, 2008 at 1:27 am
Chris
That last comment was intended for WS, btw. Don’t know how Steve climbed up on top of me like that . . . . not that I’m complaining.
May 9, 2008 at 11:27 pm
BoyGrowsUp
Help! I forgot your password. I saw it on a blog post a while back but did not write it down. I can’t do without my regular helping of Last Chance Texaco!